I'm fed up. Really.

I’m sorry to burden you with tales of my health again, but given I set this blog up initially to talk about my cancer I feel people who read this might be interested.  

Apologies if you’re not.  You can skip this post.

As you know, I had a pacemaker fitted on Christmas Eve last year to hopefully regulate my heart beat and stop it, erm, stopping!

Well it seems that it has worked.  I no longer get the terrifying pauses I was experiencing, but it has come at a cost. While my heart is now in a regular rhythm, it is way too fast.  It’s now permanently in excess of 100 beats per minute even at rest.  For someone who’s resting heart rate has always been around 40bpm this is at best uncomfortable.

It means though that even incredibly mild exercise results in chest pain, breathlessness,  nausea, immediate lactic build up in all muscles, extreme fatigue and the scary feeling I’m about to have or am actually having a heart attack.

I saw my heart consultant last week and it seems I need further surgery to repair what is now a heart valve problem.  This needs to be done urgently and I’m waiting for a date as I type this.

So, as the title of this post says, I’m seriously fed up with my lot right now.

As I posted before, the metalwork in my back has failed so I will need surgery on that eventually, I have the stress of my regular myeloma check-ups every 3 months (there's one coming up) and now this heart "issue" on top of it all.

I’m struggling to see an end to all these problems.  I really am.

And as if things couldn't get worse, the season for getting good landscape images without having to get up at "jeeeez, what time" o'clock is rapidly coming to an end.  

Roll on Autumn.

my green period!