what could have been is actually really scary

I got reasonably good at cycling.

please - I have feelings!!

I had two stints at it - one in my teens and 20s (where I didn't really take it seriously and used to amble in around half way down the field or get dropped in road races, or record bang average to disappointing results in time trials) and again in my early 30s.

Only the second time around I trained properly and results started to happen.  I regularly finished in the top 10 in time trials and entered every road race in the knowledge that with a bit of luck I could actually win the thing.  That I never did* is less down to my actual fitness and more to bad luck (a puncture usually) or dodgy tactics!

(* I did win thirteen smaller races in my time)

Anyway, it got me thinking what if I'd done things properly as a youngster and actually applied myself to my sport?

yes that's a 1980s Datsun!

I could have been a successful amateur or even a professional cyclist.  Now, don't get me wrong here, I could never have been a superstar, but I genuinely believe I could have made something of a living from the sport.

And then reality hit home!

I'd have been competing right at the start of blood boosting drugs bursting onto endurance sport - cycling in particular.  And for that reason I'd have been faced with the stark reality of having to take something illegal to get another contract or just finish last in every race and get dropped by the team.

That was the choice many average riders had to take back then. And too many of them paid with their lives.

That I've suffered heart problems later in my life  is largely down to the hours of training and racing I undertook.  Even at my level though people took "stuff" and one of the first questions my GP and then a heart consultant asked me was whether or not I'd ingested any performance enhancing drugs!

You'll be relieved and glad to know that the only "drugs" I took were the ones prescribed for exercise induced asthma.  Mine was properly diagnosed though it's surprising just how many athletes do have asthma.  I'm sure they're all genuine...

So, I'm glad now that I never actually tried that hard, and that by the time I did I was too old for it to make any real difference anyway!

Sliding doors, eh?

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One thing that genuinely terrifies me is losing any of my precious creative media data.  In this frighteningly tedious video (I'm not selling it am I?!?!) I talk you through my data storage solution while at the same time providing a service to insomniacs!